When your making a clam that your tired of something that is always always. When it comes to words that you speak on your self or speak on anyone you need watch what you say. Depression is a state of your mind and you can control the narrative. It's nothing but a devil that put in your head that your depressed. When you are ; you feel the feelings and try to fight it. Sometime you have to accept that what is going on with you is happening and you will get through it. Speak life to yourself . Maybe isolate yourself to the point where there is nothing but items and people surrounding yourself with accolades. You have achieved getting out of bed and washing your face. You woke up today and was able to do so. When you wake drink water and brush your teeth!
These are small steps to getting your mind prepared for good coming. Find a book and read on what is good in this world how someone have over came what your going through. I was going through a phase in my life where nothing seemed like it was working in my favor and going through life with out a will to do something or a pourpose to do so. No road map to what I wanted nor why I was living. I was simply existing. After a lost scholarship and partying to mask a feeling of hurt and sadness the emotions were locked away and grew bigger and bigger. Soon or later I began to partake in the worlds activities with a person that never respected me or my body and I had trained myself to think if I could just one day change his mind to think that he was doing something bad to someone that had his back all the fighting and black eyes and busted lips , wounds would be worth it. No one should ever have that train of thought. That weight of depression closed my heart to what was true, closed my eyes to see what was going on. The day I realized that this is the final straw was when my son a baby at the time saw me fighting and his scream pireced my heart and woke me up. God pulled me out of a bad situation God took hold of me and I been fighting to keep myself away from a devil that would never see me for love be for only for hate.
I say all of that to say this you constantly say I'm so sad I'm so depressed and you don't like where you are. What is it to hurt you to change something that you are doing. If your mind is not gaining peace search for peace . What would it hurt to read the Bible and search for God for your answers. What will it hurt to stop drinking a drink that is blocking something that you need to feel to move passed it. What is going to hurt that you realized your weakness and become strong in that weakness. Knowledge is power. You know drinking makes you lust women or men . And you want to keep yourself for the right one. Stop drinking .
You know hanging with certain friends distrube your mental so create a space that would feed your mental positivity gian some different friends. They did not care that it hurt you when they did it. The power of thinking about what people say it the problem with a lot of things. Who care what they think that are just as much messed up as you probably have more issues. So what will it hurt to start speaking life and writing down what your going to do. Your language is power , when you speak it could come to passed so why not speak life.